EERGUNA: Where Everything is Better, Sometimes

Before arriving in Hulun Beier's small town of Eerguna, we were told by our host, Uncle Sam, that everything is better in Eerguna. "The fish is better. The tofu is better. The air is better," he boasted in a manner befitting a hometown kid. When I asked if life is better, he grinned and nodded.


The truth is, though, I've moved to China's West Virginia.

People are constantly asking me about Mongolia. This would be a fine question to ask if I lived in Mongolia. But I don't. I'm living in Inner Mongolia. It's essentially the difference between living in Virginia and West Virginia, with the exception that Mongolia is another country and not simply another state. (So, please, guys: I'm from WEST Virginia. I'm living in INNER Mongolia.)

The women here are mostly larger than in the rest of China. The men seem to be roughly the same size as their other countrymen. Still, the bigness conjurs images of West Virginia, one of America's most obese states. While the Chinese certainly aren't obese, the Mongolian influence is definitely strong through the torso and the thighs. There's also an unfortunate amount of permed hair.

One difference I've noticed between the local ladies and me is where we wear our diamonds. I wear mine on my fingers; Eerguna girls wear theirs in their teeth.

Another difference is that while the rest of America thinks West Virginians roll around on horse-pulled carts, we don't. We leave that to the hardcore Menonites of Sugarcreek, Ohio and Lancaster, Pennsylvania. In Eerguna there are more small horses and donkeys than I-70 has domestic pick-ups.

This is the most traffic I've seen in Eerguna:



Also, notice the streets in the photo above. One thing Eerguna can hold over West Virginia's head is that they save tons of taxpayer dollars by not clearing off the roads. They just let all the ice compact itself into a hard, slippery slope. It's kind of charming in a dangerous way.

To be fair, they do clear off some roads. Really, it's just one block at a time,
but in a city with about twenty streets, why do it all at once? And why really remove it when it's just as easy to pile it up on the sidewalks?



Plus, it's so cold, most people are too bundled up to notice the mess anyway.



But, even I've had enough with my complaining. When it all thaws (sometime in May, I've heard), the grasslands of Inner Mongolia are a source of nothern Chinese pride. From my apartment window I have views of rolling hills and the Eerguna River, just like I used to see from my houses in Wheeling.

Also like West Virginia (but excluding Moundsville) the people are overwhelmingly warm, bordering on an intrusive sweetness. They swoop in for a better look at Mike's blue eyes. They want to order the most delicious foods for us when we obviously can't read menus. They invite me out dancing at the Russian disco. They buy us beer and toast to us.





On second thought, the hospitality shown to me is greater here than anywhere I've been in West Virginia. I guess I just wish the Mountaineers were warmer and less stand-offish to foreigners.

On a happier note, like West Virginia, Eerguna breeds the love of simple things. In West Virginia, it's the joy of catching a fish or eating at legendary independent restaurants. There's a certain happiness in Eerguna's Free Hot Water Fridays and taking showers in the sink. But there's another indefinable joy in receiving a hot water heater on Saturday morning.

Still, I'm not totally sold on Uncle Sam's idea that life in Eerguna is better. I will concede that it's not bad. It's actually pretty good. And the tofu is delicious.